I love Halloween, but I prefer the fun side. The creepy side can get darker than I like to experience or inflict on others. Unfortunately(especially in regards to the other poem/song submission to the 2018 Halloween Competition that I’ve been working on for weeks that’ll have to wait until next year), ever since this idea came to me in the middle of the night and kept me up for a couple hours, it’s been stuck in my head as perfectly, horribly creepy. If you don't like being scared, or if you don't want “The Ants Go Marching” to be ruined for you forever, you probably shouldn't read this. And I’m not (just) warning you to set the tone; this really creeps me out, personally.

 

Doombats are leaving one by one, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are leaving one by one, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are leaving one by one,

Going to eat until they’re done!

So they all are leaving down, to the shrine,

To fulfill Charlie’s claim! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are flying two by two, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are flying two by two, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are flying two by two,

Preparing fangs to pierce and chew!

As they all are flying down, to the shrine,

To devour and to maim! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are landing three by three, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are landing three by three, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are landing three by three,

Fluttering down on all they see!

So they all are landing down, in the shrine,

On two men and a dame! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are swarming four by four, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are swarming four by four, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are swarming four by four,

Wriggling under what they wore!

As they all are swarming down, in the shrine,

To consume with no shame! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are feasting five by five, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are feasting five by five, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are feasting five by five,

Ingesting what was once alive!

So they all are feasting down, in the shrine,

All their Stuff to reclaim! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are foraging six by six, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are foraging six by six, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are foraging six by six,

Caesar’s attention to transfix!

As they all are foraging down, in the shrine,

On Caesar’s old flame! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are chowing seven by seven, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are chowing seven by seven, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are chowing seven by seven,

Also on Don and a Thinker (named Kevin?)

As they all are chowing down, in the shrine-

Oh, Roger was his name! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are crushing eight by eight, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are crushing eight by eight, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are crushing eight by eight,

Each bite a hard depressive weight!

As they all are crushing down, in the shrine,

A ‘nothing matters’ frame! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are slowing nine by nine, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are slowing nine by nine, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are slowing nine by nine,

Not much left besides the spine,

As they all are slowing down, in the shrine,

As Caesar picks an aim! Doom! Doom! Doom!

DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

 

Doombats are finished ten by ten, oh no. Oh no.

Doombats are finished ten by ten, oh no! Oh no!

Doombats are finished ten by ten,

Jack’s attempt fails yet again,

As they all are finished down, in the shrine,

As Caesar quits the game!

 

Comments

    • Brother Mirtillo

      I admit, I did some speed-reading on later verses -- an inherent downside to predictable verse structure. But the very inevitability of the subject (and the song) meant that every last DOOM still had an impact. A harsh piece (not counting the troublesome "seven") -- no shame in the eating or the words, plenty of weight, and quite a few images evoking physical and emotional wreckage. Well played.