|A closeup view of a cluttered dresser top, the first drawer hanging open. The top of the dresser is covered in stacks of paper and a dangling graph. Atop the papers is a clock-radio, the time partly obscured but "5:18" just visible. A can of Red Bull sits beside the radio. There's a tattered poster behind the dresser with some kind of blobular cartoon character on it. Toto, we're not in Erfworld anymore.|||
Radio: -with the beefcake pantyhose.
Kill the headlights, and put it in neutral.Stock car flamin' with the loser and the cruise control.
|A huge, chubby hand lunges up and slaps the alarm clock into snooze.|||
Radio: Baby's in Reno...Sound: MIFF!
|The hand moves aside and cracks open the can of Red Bull. The alarm clock face is now totally visible. It reads, "5:18 PM".|||
|A battered brown four-door car drives down a crowded freeway. There is a deep dent in the rear door. The radio is blaring loudly.|||
Car Radio: All we wanna do is eat your brains. We're not unreasonable, I mean, no one's gonna eat your eyes...Bumper Sticker: JESUS SAVES He takes half damage.
|The chubby hand that turned off the alarm clock is seen again, wearing a calculator watch and steering the beater of a car. A red "check engine" light glows ominously on the dashboard.|||
|(There is no text in this panel.)|||
|Outside a Kinko's store, an obese figure wearing a Kinko's apron reads an issue of Dragon Magazine. In front of the figure are the remains of an unhealthy-looking meal on a plain white outdoor table.|||
|Magazine Cover: DROW|||
|The living area of an impressively unkempt apartment. Near the white-tiled entrance, the coat closet hangs open and a pile of laundry spills out, two socks spread well out onto the floor. The walls are pitted and scarred. On them hangs a poster of a fantasy babe riding a dragon, by Jamie Noguchi, and another image of the blobular cartoon character. A brown haired, greasy, overweight man sits using the computer near the posters. At his feet are two two-liter bottles of cola. Much of the room is dominated by a television, bookshelves, and collections of various console gaming systems surrounding a beanbag chair. The rest of the room is occupied by a plain brown table, on which is a small stack of books, a dustbuster, a spilled can of Mountain Dew, and a large strategy gaming board, the central feature of which is a mountain with a volcanic caldera on it.|||
|(There is no text in this panel.)|||
|A list of bookmarks in Internet Explorer.|||
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|A closeup on a pair of brown eyes and bushy black eyebrows, on a smooth, slightly greasy face.|||
Parson Gotti: 24 uniques yesterday.That would be a record, sadly.
- ^ Hamstard, the Bastard Hamster, is seen for the first time (unless you already saw him on his own site.)
- ^ The art style for "real world" scenes is noticeably different from the art style for scenes set in Erfworld. The former shows considerably more shading and detail.
- ^ The radio is playing the song "Loser" by Beck.
- ^ Parson Gotti is seen for the first time.
- ^ This is living.
- ^ This radio is playing the song "re: Your Brains" by Jonathan Coulton. Its inclusion prompted Mr. Coulton to blog about Erfworld.
- ^ The magazine is Dragon #298.
- ^ Drow are fictional dark elves from Dungeons & Dragons.
- ^ Seriously, IE?! Proper nerds use Firefox... and even moreso in 2006.
- ^ This is a real live hardzc0re pr0n site, about as Booping NSFW as you can get. If you want to see it, click on Give Me Pr0n and Fire Me Now.
- ^ "Girls Gone Feral" is a parody of the (in)famous Girls Gone Wild
- ^ Parson's speech is represented in a different font (Maiandra GD) from the one (Gorilla Milkshake) used to represent speech by the inhabitants of Erfworld.