Comments on "A Mind Broken"

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Comments on "A Mind Broken"

Postby Stryke » Mon Apr 11, 2011 8:26 pm

Comments, questions, suggestions or just some good old fashioned grammer naziing

I'm sure you all know how it works by now ;)
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Re: Comments on "A Mind Broken"

Postby Stryke » Sat Oct 15, 2011 6:11 pm

Ok lets try this again, despite lifes best efforts i have finally managed to get an update done. I'd appreciate any help on grammer and any Stupid-world terms that need translated etc. I've tried to get most of the emo stuff into this update so following updates will include substantially less of that. Plus i want to see if my refrences are as blatantly obvious as i think they are.
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Re: Comments on "A Mind Broken"

Postby tigerusthegreat » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:41 am

WW2 references for the win?
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Re: Comments on "A Mind Broken"

Postby Stryke » Mon Oct 17, 2011 5:40 am

would it have been as painfully obvious if i hadn't used the name Montgomery
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Re: Comments on "A Mind Broken"

Postby tigerusthegreat » Mon Oct 17, 2011 8:39 am

Stryke wrote:would it have been as painfully obvious if i hadn't used the name Montgomery


Until I saw Montgomery, I glossed over Aryan, but I would have picked up on it with the side of Al-Eye. Good job overall, it's interesting.
Prehendo Victoria - My first erfworld story. Comment thread

Last Updated 4/09/2014

Imperial Destiny (My Science Fiction Story) Updated 4/09/2014 (link is to first page)
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