The Battles of Erflia

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The Battles of Erflia

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 12:09 am

(this thread describes some of the major battles happening in the Erflia Campaign - it is put here to widen the catching field for our Forum Games sub-forum. Come along and play a game - your glorious victories and bitter-fought defeats could be chronicled here....)

Battle at Underopia

Ta-ta! Ta-Ra-Ta!

Enemy in the hex. What? Enemy in the hex. The signal was auto-magic. Ground forces. Nothing in the air.
Victoria looked up from the pages of diplomatic notes scattered around the throne. A distraction, at least. There was no warlord in the City, she would have to lead the battle herself. Excellent. Battle Queen mode.

“All units to the walls!” The order was subvocal, and her ruler sense let her know it was being immediately obeyed. The list of assets was automatic was well. She had always known, she would always know exactly where and what every unit in her side was. She stacked and formed them, and moved herself to the walls to look upon the enemies.

25 Archers, 5 Stabbers. One third of a C-Class Panty – that wasn’t going to be much use. One Thinkamancer – she wasn’t going to be much use either.

From the walls, Victoria looked out at the two full stacks of heavies gathered between the wall and the hex boundary. Big dogs, mostly. Wolves, or Hyenas? B-Class Heavies. And stacked with them, two, no three, C-Class heavies – Fairies? Angels? Snow Angels?

They were wearing Wonderland White. Swine. Dogs. Beasts. Snowmen. Trying to end their little war in one fell swoop? Well, we’ll see about that.

A small cough, and Victoria turned to see Lembrassa, the caster. “Majesty.”

Victoria nodded, and gave permission for her to speak.

“They have entered our hex from the North East, Majesty.”

A small nod. And?

“That road leads to the lands of Savage, Majesty. I think… I think we are betrayed.”

“Our treaty with Savage has been broken, Lembrassa. They shall give account of this day’s work.”

“Yes, Majesty.”

The preparation phase was coming to an end. There was no attempt at parley from the Wonderlanders, and none from UnderEmpire.

“Archers: First Strike. Set – Volley!”

Last edited by LTDave on Sat May 03, 2014 4:42 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Battle at Underopia

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 12:45 am

The first strike was the right of every city defense. The enemy spent their phase entering the hex, then any ranged defenders got to fire. 178 Attacks flew from the wall, and Victoria smiled to see it. However heavy, the dogs would be slaughtered on the field, and then as they attempted to breach the walls and engage with her brave Bramen.

33 hits. The dogs had good defense. Never mind. Not too shabby.

A few seconds to reorganize between phases and… oh. The dogs could dig. Victoria watched, the blood draining from her face as the hounds of war began to burrow. Oh. And the Snow Angels… ah. Gust. A cold wind blew from the Fairies, and the defending Bramen lost their ability to fire for the phase. Titans’ Teets! By the time they recovered for the next phase, all of the enemies were underground, and out of shot.


Victoria waved a hand to silence the Thinkamancer. “All units to the Garrison.”

The Garrison was, well, not. There was a space in the center of the Courtyard that was the Garrison spot, but there was no building, just a simple chair to count as a throne, and some benches were the units sat to eat. There was no defensive bonus for this space, but it was the heart of the UnderEmpire. If the garrison fell, all the defenders would be prisoners, and Victoria could not have that.

There were three routes to the Garrison – Air, Walls, and Dungeons. Victoria had a Tower to protect the Air zone, but no flying enemies. The Walls would have helped against ground units, but not burrowing units. Underopia had no Dungeons to defend against burrowers. The dogs would burst from the ground and be in the garrison in the next phase.

“Stack for maximum defense.”

Victoria walked to her throne. Her options were limited. Time for some quick flashes to her various commanders throughout the rest of the empire. Letting them know something was wrong, and to stand alert. Telling them she was proud to be their Queen.

A few seconds remained. Treasury? Better spent than captured. She turned to five of her Archers. “You are now Heavy units.”

They seemed surprised, but the arrival of extra brawn and armour was automatic.

“Lembrassa – stack with me.”

The caster shook her head. “I do not think that is wise, Majesty.”

“It is an order.”

“An order I must disobey. My defence value will lower the average of the stack, and endanger you. I think we are unlikely to survive this battle. I will do all I can to increase your odds.”

Victoria started to argue, but the next phase was beginning.

“I think it has been a pleasure, Majesty. I think.”

The Queen watched in silence as her unstacked caster solo engaged a rising wolf.

Last edited by LTDave on Sun Apr 27, 2014 3:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Battle at Underopia

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 1:12 am

The battle went much as expected. Deprived of the protection afforded by the City walls, the Bramen and Briefs were soft-targets for the Heavy Wolves. Two stacks were wiped out in the first phase of melee. Victoria directed her attacks against the stack with two Angels, which had a lower average defence. In all, her units inflicted 40 hits. The Wonderlanders had inflicted 137.

This is not good.

This might be the last phase of her life. Victoria reached a hand out to the Throne, and spent the last of UnderEmpire’s treasury.

“Live. Avenge us. Make them pay.”
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Re: Battle at Underopia

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 1:24 am

The phase ended, and Victoria was still breathing.

The stack of stabbers had been eliminated. Only Victoria and her five heavy archers remained. They were each wounded, and near the end. Her stacks had taken 81 hits. Her own Defence, and that of the Heavies, had made them a tougher nut to crack. But the wolves were too many, and 23 hits were not a tenth of what was required.

During the round pause, one of the Snow Angels wiped some blood from its face and spoke to the Queen. “Surrender. Surrender or croak.”

Victoria thought for a moment. What was a fitting response?

“You first.”


The battle ended quickly.

(Snowmen – 31 hits inflicted, UnderEmpire – 9 hits inflicted)

(all UnderEmpire defenders croaked, 24% of attackers croaked)
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Re: Battle at Underopia

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 10:11 pm

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Battle at Aiur

Postby LTDave » Sun Apr 27, 2014 10:35 pm

"For Victoria! For the UnderEmpire! Avenge Underopia!"

The Knights gave a hearty cheer as they crossed the border into the City of Aiur. A Capital city - maybe a ruler would be at home?

UnderEmpire forces:
Warlord Hugo Boss
5 Boxer Knights
1 Panty C-Class
7 Long Johns

Wonderland Forces
Chief Warlord General Winter
4 Snowguys Stabbers
10 Blizzas Archers
8 Direwolves B-Class
1 Snow Angel C-Class
3 Camewas Scouts

The first volley roars out from the defenders - 99 Attacks - it seems that the Direwolves have a ranged attack - but the Knights are heavily armoured, and only 11 strike true. Hugo laughs and kicks his Long John, spurring into action.

Aiur has no walls, no tower, no dungeons. Just a collection of Barracks gathered around a central garrison with no keep or throne room.

The defenders form stacks to maximise defence as the Boxer Knights charge home.

In the first melee phase, the Knights deal 52 wounds, eliminating the Archers. The Wonderland stacks fight back, inflicting 20 hits.

In the second melee phase, the Knights turn to the Direwolves, but find them a tougher nut with higher defence - 23 wounds given, 9 taken. The Archer stack represented more than half of the defenders combat, but were easily croaked.

In the third phase, the Knights turn to the stabbers, destroyeing them with 48 hits, taking another 9 in return.

Rounds 4 and 5 see the Knights return to the Wolves, inflicting 36 hits, and taking 6 in return.

Hugo prepares his sword to strike again at General Winter, but he has had enough of death. His wolf stack is almost destroyed, and the infantry lie slaughtered about. There is no point in continuing.

"Enough! Enough. We yield. The City is yours."

(UnderEmpire forces take 34% casualties, remaining Wonderland troops surrender)

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Re: Battle at Underopia

Postby LTDave » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:00 pm


General Winter shouts his defiance before the final phase of the battle of Aiur...
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Re: The Battles of Erlia

Postby LTDave » Thu May 01, 2014 2:50 pm

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The Unmentionable Battle.

Postby LTDave » Thu May 01, 2014 2:58 pm

Unmentionable, turn 12.

Enemies in the air-space.

Boxers and Bramen look to the sky - after the previous turn's upsets, they are expectant of a vast horde descending to wreak fierce vengeance.


Just a scout warlord, riding on a flying silver sphere.

The unit peered at the city and defenders, and then turned to leave.

If there had been a commander in the city, they might have called for mercy on such a pointless unit. Of course, if a commander had been present, they might have been incensed at the murder of Queen Victoria, she of the many secrets, and the capture and likely destruction of Underopia, that glorious city of the East. Had such an incensed commander been present, it is likely they would have ordered the destruction of the scout and the whirring, shimmering, sphere.

There was no commander present, and the response was automatic. The ranged units aimed and fired.

144 attacks, 60 hits.

It would have only taken 11.

Moments before death, the scout held her hand to her ear and said... "This has been Anchor Trisha, reporting for Voyera..."
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The Unmentionable Battle

Postby LTDave » Thu May 01, 2014 3:51 pm

The trumpet calls again, and the defenders look this time to the ground outside the city walls.

The scout was, well, a scout.

Here is the main force. Warriors, clad in desert robes. Female, as far as can be told. With fierce blades and eyes black as a very black thing. Sand Elves. The fighting Veshtu have arrived, ready to satisfy their contract with proud Voyera.

16 Braman (Archers)
2 Long John (Beast A Mounts)
4 Boxer (Knights)

Anchor Smiles Chief Warlord
40 Veshtu Warriors (Stabbers)

The first fire privilege goes to UnderEmpire, and 144 shots fly from the walls to land amongst the foe. But the Veshtu are not defenceless - only 21 hits are inflicted.

The Veshtu mercenaries charge the walls, thowing grappling hooks and scrambling up makeshift ladders. The walls of Unmentionable are level 1, and provide a level of protection from attack to the Defenders, but this is a very one-sided affair.

Round 1: Voyera inflicts 88 hits, destroying one Braman stack, and almost wiping out the other. UnderEmpire replies with 29 hits.

Round 2: One Voyera stack wipes out the last of the Braman with 5 hits, and the rest turn to the Boxer Knights - 28 hits against these very tough-nuts. The Knights hit back - 14 hits, with the dying Braman adding 1 more.

Round 3: The walls are protecting the Knights, but it is mainly their incredible armour saving them against the flurry of blows. The dance-figthing Veshtu laugh and sing as they slash and cut - 33 hits, to UnderEmpire's 15.

Round 4: Not enough rounds have passed to admit surrender, and the Knights have no commander. It is down to the death. Voyera's Veshtu cut up the last of the defenders - 41 hits against 4.

Unmentionable has fallen to Voyera and their bloodthirsty Veshtu allies.

(All UnderEmpire forces eliminated - Voyeran Casualties: 18%)
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Re: The Battles of Erflia

Postby Silversought » Thu May 01, 2014 6:23 pm

It had been a rout. The victorious Veshtu filled the city, comparing wounds and celebrating the amazing ability to wreak destruction and croak that they all possessed. Despite this ambiance of revelry, the Voyeran Warlord stood over the body of a croaked knight, pensive as the rush of war left his blood. The Titans would look down upon him with favor today; they would probably look down with favor upon this knight before him. To die in battle was to please the Titans, was it not? Perhaps. . . perhaps the Mogul could improve his philosophy a bit if he found himself in a war. It would be insightful. Smiles though. . . Smiles just kept on smiling and cleaning his sword. Maybe he was thinking too hard about this.

"Twenty nameless units. Ten left."
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The Second Battle of Aiur

Postby LTDave » Fri May 02, 2014 10:39 pm

Hugo got up and walked away from the burning hut. His Knights were gathered around the flames, holding their hands out to the warmth. Once again, Hugo walked to the edge of the city boundary, where the wall might have been. The Sun still hung there, a handspan above the horizon. It had hung there for what felt like forever. This off-turn was lasting a very long time.

Hugo clapped his hands and rubbed them together. How was this hex so damned cold? Wasn't Erflia a desert? It must be some kind of wretched signamancy.

All about lay the piles of corpses from this morning's battle. They were scattered at random about the burning remains of the city. There was a smaller but more orderly pile where the prisoners had been dispatched. General Winter lay there, buried under the stinking forms of his dog companions. Hugo had considered adding the bodies to the fires, to clean up the city streets, but what was the point? The corpses would de-pop at the start of the next turn. If this turn ever ended.

Hugo walked back to his stack. One or two of them gave him a nod. None smiled. There was not much to smile about, not today.
Unmentionable was lost to a horde of barbarians. The exact story was unclear, just a simple knowledge conveyed by King Calvin, wherever he was.

Next turn. Next turn would be better.

Ta-Ra! Ta-ra-ta-ta!

Enemies in the hex.

"Stack up." Hugo vaulted onto his trusted Long John and rode back to the city-edge. Two stacks of heavies had entered the city hex. More wolves, and a snow angel or two. But... wearing Voyeran blue? Not Wonderland Grey. It did not matter. Enemies were enemies, regardless of raiment.

UnderEmpire Forces:
Warlord Hugo Boss
8 Boxer Knights
4 Long John Beasts
1 Special-C Panty
1 Scout
133 hits, 135 combat, 5.9 average defence

Voyeran Forces
2 Heavy Snow Angels
21 Heavy Direwolves
307 hits, 205 combat, 6.0 average defence

One of the Snow Angels stepped forward to announce Parley, and started on the to speak... But Hugo was not listening. This had gone on long enough. "Fire."

Boxer Knights have ranged weapons as well as lances, and together with the Panty 114 attacks fly out from the city. The attacking wolfstacks take 16 hits.

There are no walls. There is no point maneuvering. The Snow Angels use their Gusts to reduce attacks from some of the Knight stacks, and go into their pretty dances, but the whole thing is still a mess.
Round 1: 16 UE hits to 34 VA hits.
Round 2: 19 UE hits to 31 VA hits.
Round 3: 9 UE hits to 25 VA hits.
Round 4: 7 UE hits to 22 VA hits.
Round 5: 1 UE hits to 18 VA hits.

All UnderEmpire forces eliminated in 5 rounds of combat. 22% Voyeran casualties. Aiur falls to Voyera.
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The Last Battles of the Wonderpire War

Postby LTDave » Sun May 04, 2014 12:16 am


It was more of a skirmish, really.

The last UnderEmpire units in a coherent formation attacked the tiny garrison left at Underopia.

Fruit von Loom, the last of UE's warlords, led a small detachment of twelve Archers and a single stabber into the once proud capital of his people.

The defenders amounted to two Archers and a Scout.

The fighting was brief, and ended abruptly.

Underopia fell to a level 0 city, and the UnderEmpire troops, unable to make upkeep, also faded from existence.

Thus ended the Wonderpire war, not with a roar or a shout, but with a whisper.
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Battle at Goanna City

Postby LTDave » Sun May 25, 2014 2:56 pm


UnNamed looked at Unnamed. Something was happening. Enemies. Enemies in the hex. On the ground, but burrowing units present.

“We’d better go.”

Unnamed nodded. “Yes. Good luck, UnNamed Warlord.”

A grim nod back. “Same to you, Unnamed Courtier.”

Telegraphia had already fallen, sometime before the turn started. Dawn had come, and so had the flying lizards of Savage. Now Goanna City was under attack. The Grand New Eastern Alliance had moved quickly. Semaphor lay between the two Empires, and was an inconvenience.

UnNamed arrived on the wall, and stacked with the desert stabbers. Morgan, the Hatamancer raised an eyebrow as he joined them.

“Tough break, this.”

UnNamed tilted his head. “Sir?”

“To pop this morning, and croak before you’ve even seen a turn begin. To never hear the Ferrr-Durrrp of freedom. Tough break.”

UnNamed nodded. “I suppose.” Pause. “Wait, what? You think I’m going to croak?”

Morgan laughed slightly. “No, Warlord. Not you, specifically. I mean us, generally. This is a put up job. The Titans handed us a size 5 hat and a 55 inch head.”

He rolled his eyes at UnNamed. “I mean we’re all going to croak. You, them, her…” he waved a hand towards the Mute Princess, who was stacked nearby with the Giant Goannas. “Even me. No Portal room means no escape for Casters, which is why I’m stacked up here. Never mind. At least I’ve lived a little. Well, I’ve never left this city. And I’ve never seen the Magic Kingdom. And I’ve never made…”

He broke off as the Mute Princess started waving her little flags.

“Show time!”

Morgan took off his bowler, and pulled out four pieces of parchment, rolled up and tied with blue ribbon. He pulled at the knot while UnNamed watched, fascinated.

“Nothing up my sleeves.”


Thorin Oakenshield looked over at the Duke O’York. They had marched up and down this desert together for as long as he could remember. Apart from one minor skirmish at a hunting site eight turns ago, they had done nothing but march and train and forage for extra morsels on the side of the desert roads. The Duke was fond of Wabbits, wascally though they were. Oakenshield preferred Wenison, but the one time they had found a deer, popped in the wrong hex by Titanic oversight, the Duke had taken the best parts.

They had quarrelled.

Now Duke O’York was Chief Warlord, and even though that argument had been four turns ago, Thorin doubted it had been forgotten.

He doubted it because he here was, stacked with the Knights and the stinking Hammer-Heads, tasked with burrowing under the walls and attacking the city via the dungeons. Unpleasant work. But the worst part was the defence. Oh, the Knights were alright. But the Hammer-Heads? The useless things were just bags of flesh. No armour, no dodging capacity.

Thorin was stacked with the group with the lowest average defence on the field.

And that meant two things.

One: Duke O’York had not forgotten their quarrel from a few turns ago, and Two: Arrow fodder.

The chime inside Thorin’s head dinged, and the first phase started – no Parley – straight to first fire.

Thorin stiffened himself in his saddle, and pulled his shield closer.

“By the fires of Kadesh, I will make him pay for this…”

679 first fire attacks – 239 hits.

Thorin opened his eyes. He saw the Titans…

UnNamed blinked away the blaze of light before his eyes. Titans torches! That been impressive.

A full stack of Knights and their Mounts had ceased to exist – blasted with magic, showered with arrows, and buried under the natural dirtamancy of the Goanna beasts.

He turned to Morgan. “What else can you do?”

Morgan shrugged. “Nothing. I’m done. Can’t cast if it isn’t your turn. Yes! I know that’s been retconned, but I am an old fashioned kind of mancer – I don’t hold with these modern ways of thinking…”

UnNamed looked back at the field, away from the eternal griping of pedants. The remaining Downtown units were advancing to engage in combat. The wall would protect them. A bit. Surely.

Combat: Round 1
Veshtu inflict 127 hits on desert slingers, who return the favour with 103 hits.
Duke O’York orders his Siege units to ignore the walls and concentrate on the defenders. This will be over before the walls can be damaged.
35 hits inflicted on UnNamed’s stack.
UnNamed and Mute Princess stacks reply with 42 hits.

UnNamed saw the stack with the enemy chief warlord angling towards the Mute Princess. Something inside him kicked, and he ordered his stack to engage, shielding the ruler from the attack.

“So that’s what loyalty feels like.” UnNamed mused as he dodged one blow, only to take another. He struck back. It was innate – the old battle cry: “Croak the ruler, end the side!”

Not today. Well, not yet, anyway.

Duke O’York grinned behind his helmet. Things were going well. Two of the five enemy stacks eliminated, and two more virtually wrecked. Thorin was croaked, and the Veshtu were taking serious damage – but mercenary blood is cheaper than your own, and that whole “you took my Wenison – I shall be avenged” nonsense had been very wearing. Oakenshield just did not know how to live and let live. Well, now he did not know how to live.

He had four stacks remaining, the enemy three. Time to end this little fracas. Time to earn some extra glory.

“Prisoners! I want prisoners!”

And the best way to get prisoners was to end the side…

Veshtu 1 engages the remaining Desert Slingers, eliminating them with 30 hits. The slingers give 22 hits back.

Veshtu 2 and Duke O’York engage the Mute Princess Stack, inflicting 97 hits, croaking the ruler and her Giant Goanna escorts.

Veshtu 3 takes hits from UnNamed stack without fighting back. Well, I say takes hits. Out of 18 attacks left to the stack, none strike home.

The battle is over. Goanna City falls to Downtown.
Downtown take 53% casualties.

UnNamed looked at the sword in his hand. Useless. He had done his best – he had swung with all his might and skill – but nothing had hit home. The Veshtu did not even try to strike back – they just laughed and jeered – did one of them flash him? Wardrobe malfunction seemed more likely.

He looked over at where his ruler lay croaked on the ground, a small white flag flapping defiantly in the breeze. Semaphor would wave no more.

“Turns out I was wrong, Warlord.”

UnNamed turned to see the Hatamancer, bleeding heavily, but living.

“We don’t get to see the Titans thisturn.”
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